Corporate Fucks Gunna Corporate.

Corporate Gunna Corporate.

By Dan Dobbin.

Like the rising of the sun, the surf going flat when you get a new board or Pierre landing a backflip you can always count on soulless corporate fucks trying to cashing in a big social event or tragedy.

Hong Kong based Stallion Sports , owners of toy company Wham-O who flog off  Morey Bodyboards, BZ bodyboards and Churchill Swimfins in core surf stores like Costco for as little as $29.99 have come up with a shitmix way of honouring the passing of Tom Morey.

For $250 ‘Merican dollary doos you can secure to yourself one of 500 individually numbered and authenticated limited run Mach 7’s.

“So what?” You say. Eppo and Mez flogged off limited edition retro rockets for $1000 a pop, Hubboard’s are currently slinging out a small number of Haouli VF remakes.

The difference here is that unlike the above endeavours, Wham-O’s limited run of Morey boards have sweet fark all to do with, and will in no way benefit, the Morey family. Indeed the Morey family issued this blistering response via social media early today Aussie time:

Now we don’t want to jump to conclusions here, but it seems like InterSport might just be dancing on the grave of the late, great Tom in order to leverage a few more bucks into the pockets of their shareholders.

It well may be asked if Wham-O cared so much about the wellbeing of the Morey family and honouring the legacy of the creator of the boogie, then maybe, just maybe, they could have arranged something like this before Tom’s passing to help with his medical bills and comfort in his declining years.

Still, if bodyboarders know anything, they know who’s in it for the love and who isn’t. The breaking news of this blatant and barefaced highway robbery has provoked a furious response from boogers around the globe.

Fermenting talk of the manifestation of a grassroots movement to pressure sporting and surf stores not to stock the Morey boards when they are released, naming and shaming any who cross the pocket lines and pre-order a board, calling the offices of Morey bodyboards to give them a piece of your mind….

It seems that just like Ghandi’s Salt march, Rosa Parks refusing to move seats during the civil rights movement, or portly rich white millionaire Clive Palmer wanting to reclaim Australia for the downtrodden like himself, bodyboarders around the globe are rising up and uniting to send a message to the corptocracy elites that Tom Morey’s legacy belongs to us, not them, and the cheapening and tarnishing of that legacy will be met with stout resistance!

More as the pitchforks and tiki torches come out….

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *